WASHINGTON – It stands to reason that if you can stay on Donald Trump's good side long enough to win a season of "Celebrity Apprentice," you would have the right stuff to handle the job as his White House chief of staff.
That's British TV personality Piers Morgan's position, anyway.
Morgan told Trump that he wished to "formally apply" for the job in an open letter published by the Daily Mail on Tuesday.
"You might not immediately recognize what qualities I have for such a massive job in your administration, especially following a hugely respected war hero like General John Kelly," Morgan wrote. "But the key thing is to have someone at your side that understands you, has known you a long time, likes you and commands your respect."
Morgan cited the praise Trump gave him after naming him his "first Celebrity Apprentice" in the 2008 season finale.
"'Piers, you’re a vicious guy. I’ve seen it. You’re tough. You’re smart. You’re probably brilliant, I’m not sure. You’re certainly not diplomatic. But you did an amazing job and you beat the hell out of everybody,'" Trump said, according to Morgan.
And Morgan also pitched himself with a message that amounted to "beggars can't be choosers."
"Nobody else is exactly storming the ramparts of the White House demanding you hire them for the toughest job in world politics," Morgan told the president.
Trump weighs chief of staff candidates: 'Why wouldn’t someone want' the job?
"Why is it considered such a poisoned chalice? Because everyone knows there can only be one chief in the White House, and his name is Donald J. Trump. You’re your own Chief of Staff, and always have been," he opined.
He closed with 10 reasons he should be the next White House Chief of staff:
- "You need someone who will look you in the eye and tell you when you’re being an idiot. Seriously."
- He would "surround the Oval Office with loyal people who like and respect you, not the type of ghastly, untrustworthy reptiles like Omarosa Manigault Newman."
- He would vet Trump's tweets.
- He would get the media to focus more on Trump's achievements.
- He would be a chief of staff "who gets on with Ivanka and Jared, and encourages you to listen to them as much as possible."
- He could bring an end to the war with CNN.
- Things are about to get heated with special counsel Robert Mueller. "I love a scrap."
- He would "use Melania more. She’s become a very popular electoral asset."
- "I’d literally pay to work for you."
- "You need someone whose reputation won’t be remotely tarnished by working with you and who won’t mind in the slightest if you suddenly fire him."
Morgan unleashes on Duchess Meghan: She's 'acting her way to the top'