Tough part of this job? Finding tee time at last second, waiting on AAA

12:58 AM CDT on Monday, May 29, 2006

PHOENIX – One of the frustrating things about my job is that people are constantly reminding me how great my job is.

Obviously, these people have never attempted to book a tee time at TPC Scottsdale on a moment's notice. And imagine waking up and finding out that a Marriott property is refusing to comp your breakfast.

The other day, one of my so-called friends had the audacity to ask, "So they're paying you to fly to Phoenix for the Western Conference finals and not write about basketball?"

BRAD LOPER / DMN

The Gorilla

My response: "I'd like to see you write a David Hasselhoff story on deadline."

My trip to the Valley of the Sun began with a tire blowout outside D/FW's north entry point.

I responded by doing what every other red-blooded American male would do:

I placed a frantic call to AAA.

Minutes later, Curtis arrived and broke the tire-changing record held by John Schneider and Tom Wopat.

The good news is that I eventually arrived at US Airways Center, which changes its name every few years to stay fresh.

The Suns were formed in 1968 when it was determined the citizens of Phoenix needed something to do other than complain about the weather. Soon after, the organization decided to hire a gorilla mascot because, as I've said many times, primate costumes will never go out of style.

Do gorilla costumes scare young children? You bet they do, but I say it's worth the risk.

The last two rounds of the playoffs have proven that the French are producing more than fine perfume. First, it was Tony Parker and his Desperate girlfriend. Now, the Mavs have run into the French buzzsaw that is Boris Diaw.

Makes me wonder if Dallas gave up on the sharp-shooting Antoine Rigaudeau a little too early. If you don't remember the Rigaudeau era, consider yourself lucky.

In addition to smoking cigarettes during timeouts, Rigaudeau had trouble picking up on the nuances of the game.

Like dribbling, for instance.

I brought up Rigaudeau's name to the man who discovered him, Donnie Nelson, before Sunday's game. I've found that folks really seem to enjoy being confronted with their biggest failures, but Nelson couldn't have been nicer.

"Sometimes you miss," he said. "You have to keep swinging."

It's just not right that Mavs TV analyst Bob Ortegel is having to sit with me in the auxiliary press box. I'm planning to address this situation the next time we come to Phoenix. ... Each room at the Renaissance Scottsdale Resort is equipped with its own hot tub, which is always refreshing when it's 123 outside. ... About an hour before Sunday's tip, Dirk Nowitzki was posting up 6-3 former Mav Brad Davis. I know Davis was a tremendous low post defender and all, but couldn't Dirk find a better use of his time? ... Had nice conversations with TNT's two courtside reporters. Craig Sager wanted to make sure you guys knew his sport coat was lilac, not lavender. Cheryl Miller and I had a surreal conversation about the importance of Baywatch in American culture.

E-mail mmosley@dallasnews.com