Art Deco buildings compete with the flashy locals

03:02 AM CDT on Thursday, June 15, 2006

MIAMI – A man who goes by the name Prince Charles welcomed me to South Beach on Wednesday.

Just after finding a parking spot on Ocean Drive, I ran into his Highness, one of the area's famously flamboyant residents.

He was wearing a long, strapless black dress, accessorized with red tennis shoes, red hat and a Marlboro Red.

"I'm going to show you what a real woman dresses like," he muttered to me as he passed.

Hey, I'm open to constructive criticism.

I continued strolling, with the ocean on one side and the colorful and distinctive row of Art Deco hotels such as the Colony, Avalon and Clevelander on the other.

I stopped for lunch and people watching on the front patio of the Clevelander, which uses the motto, "Sleep with us and leave. We're used to it."

Apparently, the scene was pretty tame because it was 2 p.m. instead of 2 a.m., but men and women strolled by with no shame about a lot hanging out of their very skimpy suits.

Prince Charles paraded by, now wearing an elegant silver gown.

After more walking – turned down an offer to join a time-share and saw the modeling agency from the MTV show 8th and Ocean – I stopped by Palace Food Bar to ask a very shirtless bartender why he was wearing a Dallas Cowboys hat.

"I love the Cowboys," he said. "They're my favorite team."

When I told him I was from Dallas, he offered me a drink on the house.

I chatted briefly with Seth Shuttlesworth, who is originally from Austin, but now bartends at a hot Miami nightspot. Loved his Prada shades and his beagle, Domingo. He said he's cheering for the Mavs in the Finals.

"I'm a Texas boy through and through," he said. "We don't like the Heat."

As fate would have it, Prince Charles stopped by. I had to speak with him.

He said he loved Texas and would like to move there.

"I want to be a cowboy, baby," he said, now having changed into a new black number, complete with sequins and ruffles.

"Come on," I told him. "Dallas could use a little South Beach."

I got a different vibe when I drove up Collins Avenue (also known as A1A) to check out the glitzy scene at The Shore Club, a reportedly luxurious hotel that attracts celebrities and such. The hotel's guests are protected from the view of the adjoining public beach with tall hedges, fences and palm trees.

Fittingly enough, to get into the extravagant pool area – featuring two pools, including an infinity pool, and lots of cushy, colorful cushions – you must have what's called a Privilege card.

But the public beach is gorgeous, sprinkled with red, yellow and blue chairs, cabanas and umbrellas that beachgoers can rent.

BRAD LOPER/DMN

Charles Easter, aka 'Prince Charles,' strikes a pose along the Art Deco buildings of Ocean Drive in South Beach. The prince looks like a princess in this black cocktail dress.

Everyone looked like they were having fun, especially the two round, bald men in Speedos taking a stroll through the white sand.

Took a drive through Little Havana. Spotted a shop with a "Parking for Cubans Only" sign in the window, a memorial for the Bay of Pigs Invasion and trucks with bananas and other fruit hanging in the back. Stopped by Maximo Gomez Park and Domino Club, where old men smoked cigars and laughed and argued, but mostly played dominos and chess. They don't pay much attention to the tourists that come into the park to gawk. ... Please, please stop e-mailing me about Elliott Yamin. ... Drove by the Orange Bowl. It's pretty run down. ...Have a great view of Biscayne Bay from my hotel room. Haven't gotten around to lying in the poolside hammocks yet. Hopefully, that will be rectified today.

E-mail khairopoulos@dallasnews.com